His Reflections
by notarealauthorbuttrying
Summary: When I reach for the handle, I feel my chest spasm in panic as I realize something. The connection between me and my soulmate isn't open. I shouldn't be able to see Lance right now without the connection, but I do. Lance is really here with only a few feet and a door between us. Or; Keith really can't stand the concept of soulmates, but can't help but like his
1. Chapter 1: Soulmates are Stupid

He's applying another stupid face mask again, I notice as I brush my teeth.  
He's waiting a table at a diner with that stupid apron tied around his hips, I watch while paying for my lunch in a fast food restaurant.  
He's flirting with someone else, I try to ignore while doing my homework.  
Soulmates are stupid.  
When we connected a few years ago, it was torture on my end. I would see him everywhere and it was terribly distracting. He seemed ecstatic, though - I learned to read lips through him and I catch him saying "soulmate" all the time to others.  
He can't see me, though, and for that I'm relieved. I would've hated to break down his spirit if he saw how annoyed I was when we connected.  
The universe is stupid.  
It decides to connect two strangers together spontaneously and give them consequences for it. Not even everybody gets connected with someone, so why did I - someone who hates the entire concept - have to be one of the few who did?  
Soulmates are able to feel the emotions, pain, and pleasure the other feels as long as their connection is open or if it's strong enough. Along with that, if they're connection is open, they also can taste, smell, see, or hear the other, but it's different for everybody.  
For me, I see my soulmate through reflective surfaces. I suspect mine can taste what I taste. It's sometimes funny, though - I ate a jalape o with our connection open and laughed as he started bouncing around and fanning his tongue. But that's the only sentimental moment we've shared in the years we've been connected, and I often feel guilty about it. After all, it is my fault for being distant with him His name is Lance, but I feel uncomfortable knowing that private information without him knowing even what I look like. The only reason I found out was by basically spying on him while he was working and read his nametag while our connection was open. However, I can't lie about his looks; he's really attractive. Sometimes when our connection is open, I find myself blatantly watching him just because I can't resist.  
It's torture, really.  
I'm always chastised by my friend to be thankful but I can't stand when something this big is out of my hands. And that's where I am now - stuck through a lecture led by my friend, Shiro, on why I should be grateful to be paired by the universe.  
At moments like this, I regret choosing him as the only person to know about my soulmate.  
"-that so many people wish they could have a soulmate? And by the way you're describing him, it sounds like your soulmate is ecstatic to have you," he crosses his arms and leans his hip against the side of the bench where I sit.  
I roll my eyes and tighten my leather jacket around me - it's colder today than I expected it to be - before saying, "Okay, but is it necessary to tell me every time I breath?"  
"Yes," he replies matter-of-factly.  
I huff but hide my smirk as I point out, "You're just jealous because you're secretly a hopeless romantic at heart."  
He punches my shoulder but I don't have to look at him to know he's sporting a small blush on his ears and neck.  
Before he can protest, the bus finally comes and we hurry onto it and out of the cold, even though it is only a few degrees warmer inside. We take our seats side by side in silence.  
"Have you found a new job yet?" Shiro suddenly asks after a while.  
I sigh. He has asked me everyday since I got fired from my last one. "No."  
"Good," he grins, causing me to look at him incredulously. "I think I can get you one where I work. Matt just quit so there's a new opening for a cashier."  
"Really?" I sit up, hopeful.  
Shiro nods, "I'll talk to my boss about getting you an interview and text you later to let you know what he says."  
I smile, "Thanks. That would help a lot."  
"I know," he smiles back. The bus slows to a stop and he stands up, resting his hand on my shoulder briefly. "I'll talk to you later, yeah?"  
I nod and he gets off. Fortunately for him, this bus stop is on the same block as the convenience store where he works. Unfortunately for me, after two more stops I get off and still have to walk three blocks to get to my apartment building.  
Once I pay and get off the bus, I immediately put in my earbuds and turn on some music. The wind picks up and the sun has set almost completely so I cross my arms and duck my head down in an attempt to keep myself warm. It has gotten ridiculously cold and it's only November. I don't even own a winter coat.  
With a frostbitten nose, I finally make it inside the building and shake out my limbs, as if it will expel the cold faster. I press the button for the elevator and toy with my keys as I wait. That is, until I feel the connection opening.  
It's like a wind hitting me full force. I shudder and hurry into the elevator where it's a little more private than the lobby. After pressing the fourth button, I press my back against the wall facing the closing doors and grip onto the railing, a sudden, strong feeling pounding into my chest. I grip my eyes shut but can't help feel worried - usually my soulmate's emotions are positive, but this one feels like a dull anxiety.  
I swallow and risk opening my eyes. A green "2" blinks above the elevator doors. My eyes flicker to the metal wall to my right and I see him pacing in his room with his friend - who I often see with him - sitting on his bed watching him nervously. Once the elevator lugs to a stop, I rush out and into my apartment after nearly dropping my keys several times trying to unlock the door. When inside, I avoid looking at any reflective surfaces while kicking my shoes off and tossing my jacket and backpack on the couch.  
I find myself glancing at the TV, watching Lance in its reflection. His friend is no longer in his room and he is sitting on the edge of his bed, elbows on his knees and hands crossed. I step closer to get a better look and notice he's talking to himself.  
"-really wish you. . . with me. Are. . . even there?" I make out. I sigh and slump over, letting his now lonely and longing emotions fill my chest, too. He's talking to me.  
I desperately try to think of a way to cheer him up. I hurry to my fridge, knowing taste is the way to go with this, and search through its contents. I can't help but smirk when I see the almost empty jar of jalape os. I grab it and my half-gallon jug of milk and hurry into my bathroom before the connection splits. Lance is now laying on his back, hands covering his face. The lonely feeling is getting stronger.  
After practically tearing off the lid to the jar, I take out two slices of jalape os and drop them in my mouth, masticating them thoroughly so the spice covers all sides of my tongue. It doesn't take long until I see Lance snap up, hands covering his mouth. He searches around his room frantically for anything to drink so I take my milk and chug some of it. Relief instantly washes over his face and I notice his shoulders shake with a small chuckle. A warm feeling radiates through my chest and I smile.  
Relief and happiness.  
"I'm here," I whisper without thinking. The connection ends shortly after and the reflection of Lance in his room fades into my pale face, clouded by dark hair. Immediately, the smile from my face and happiness in my chest are replaced by a frown and a sour feeling in the pit of my stomach.  
Soulmates are stupid.

"I mean, I really appreciate the help getting me a job and all, but did you have to schedule my interview for me?" I huff, shrugging my shoulder to hike the strap farther up, walking quickly down the sidewalk. "For the last time, I didn't schedule it for you. This morning is the only available time my boss has for the next two weeks. Don't you need to pay for rent?" he points out, enticing a scowl from me. "He's leaving tonight with his family for Thanksgiving break. You're lucky he even agreed to interview you today."  
I roll my eyes, "I guess I should also thank you for waking me up at two in the morning to tell me the interview was six hours from then, yeah? I hardly got any sleep after that! I had to find an outfit, rewrite my resume, and run to the library and back to print it. And it was freezing out! Not to mention we missed the bus because of it, hence why we're practically jogging there now."  
Shiro groans, "I'm sorry, okay? I fell asleep and forgot to tell you. Then, Slav woke me up at 2 and I couldn't go back to sleep - that's when I remembered to call you."  
"I hate your stupid cat," I grumble.  
"Yeah, he tends to be very. . . inconvenient," he winces, rubbing the back of his neck. "Anyway, come on. We have ten minutes to get there," he says, grabbing the handle of my backpack and pushing me forward.  
"Easy, easy, we're right down the block from it," I frown, swatting his hand away.  
When we walk inside a short while later, I shudder in the warmth. It's colder today, but I was more prepared than yesterday. Above my dress shirt, I have a hoodie and my leather jacket on top along with my gloves. Shiro orders me to take off my layers while he fetches his boss in the back of the store, so I do without too much protest since it's much warmer in the store. I also take my resume out from my backpack and kick the pile of my jackets and backpack out of the way in case any costumers come in.  
Soon after, he returns with a tall man. But, when Shiro sees my wrinkled, black dress shirt with the top button undone, the pep in his step turns more into dread. I mentally blame the fact that I couldn't iron it this morning on him.  
"You must be Keith," his boss states, holding out his hand for me to shake. He doesn't seem too concerned about my wrinkled shirt, at least. "I'm Kolivan."  
I shake his hand, "Nice to meet you."  
"Shiro tells me you need a job. What hours are you available to work?" he asks. After telling him the available hours around my school schedule, he says, "Great, you've got the job. I'll pencil you in the schedule and we can get you started by next Monday. Does that sound good?"  
I blink at him, surprised. "Uh, really? Yeah, that sounds great."  
"Good. Now if you two will excuse me, I have quite a bit work to get done before my flight," he grins before walking away.  
"Uh. . ." I mumble, my forlorn resume crinkling slightly in my hand. Even Shiro looks surprised. "Respectfully, what the hell?"  
Shiro laughs breathily. "I have no idea. Just be glad - he's usually much harder on people he interviews."  
"Must be because he's in a rush," I shrug, crumpling my resume into a ball.  
Shiro smirks, "Or he just likes me."  
I squint at him, "That doesn't make any sense."  
"Sure it does. Now, let's go. You need to get to class soon," he says, nodding at my things on the floor.  
"I still have half an hour," I protest, but put my stuff back on anyway.  
"Then we'll stop for coffee to celebrate your new job on the way," he smirks. I tug my gloves on and throw my backpack over my shoulder again, sighing. "I'll pay, don't worry. Plus, there's a diner on the way that I've been wanting to try out."  
We head out and ride the bus into campus. The wind picks up so I throw my hood over my head on our way to the diner. "I don't have to go in, do I?" I ask once I spot a familiar silhouette ahead walking towards us.  
"No, we can get it to go. Why don't you want to go in?" he asks.  
"I see a friend up there I want to catch up with, do you mind?" I ask.  
He shakes his head, "No, I'll be back out soon."  
I nod and we split up, him entering the diner and me walking past it. "Pidge!" I call out, winning her attention over the phone in her gloved hands. I wave to her and she waves back, jogging up to me.  
"Hey, Satan, what's up?" she grins.  
I roll my eyes but smirk at her new, odd greeting. "I'm going to head to class after my friend grabs me a coffee," I say, nodding my head towards the diner. She glances at it briefly as I add, "What about you?"  
"I'm heading to class, too. Who's your friend?" she asks, shoving her phone and hands into the pockets of her giant, puffy coat. "Shiro. He sometimes works as an assistant to one of the professors."  
"His name sounds familiar," she tilts her head in thought, "Which professor?"  
"Mr. Wimbleton. He teaches prosthetic nursing, I think," I respond.  
"Why only sometimes?" she asks, kicking a pebble past my feet.  
"Well, Shiro actually has a prosthetic arm so whenever Mr. Wimbleton needs him for a class, he's there," I shrug. "Plus he has a second job."  
Pidge's eyes brighten. "No way! That's so cool, can I see it?"  
I smirk, "You'll have to pay him a lot to get him to take off his coat in this weather, Pidgeon."  
She scowls as I attempt to ruffle her hair through the hat on her head. Shiro comes back outside as she fixes it. "Ready?" he asks, handing me a steaming to-go cup.  
"Not yet. Shiro, this is Pidge. She's a student here for technological astrology-" I start.  
"Astrophysics. Technological astrophysics," she corrects. "Keith tells me you have a prosthetic. Could I see?" she adds excitedly. Shiro grins, "Sure." He rolls up his sleeve just below his right elbow and stretches out his metal fingers.  
"Wow," Pidge muses. "That's so cool!"  
"Pidge believes that someday she will have prosthetic legs with jets built into the heels," I smirk at Shiro.  
She kicks my shin, "Only when I was younger I did!"  
"Hey, you wouldn't happen to be related to Matt Holt, would you?" he asks before taking a sip of his own coffee.  
"Yeah, he's my brother, do you know him?" she asks.  
Shiro nods, "I used to work with him but he just quit."  
"That's why your name sounded familiar," Pidge realizes.  
We make our way to our classes together, Pidge somehow managing to drink half of my coffee before we go our separate ways. Once inside the building of my first class, I chug the remaining coffee before tossing the cup in a bin outside my classroom. So much for my reward for getting a job.  
By the time I finish my classes, it's past lunchtime and my stomach had been growling throughout the entirety of the last one. I take a mental note to eat more than a bagel for breakfast from now on as I head for the bus stop. It's Thursday today, meaning Shiro works all afternoon and therefore I have no plans. I spot the diner from this morning between me and the bus stop and my stomach growls again. After contemplating the small and quickly diminishing money in my wallet, I decide to indulge into a well-earned lunch.  
At least, that's what I tell myself as I pass the bus stop. After all, I still have twenty minutes until the bus comes and it's freezing out.  
As I walk past one of the windows to the diner, I look inside for the first time - I didn't get a chance to this morning. Instead, I see Lance waiting a table with the same stupid apron around his hips. I huff and look down to avoid seeing him, heading for the door. When I reach for the handle, I feel my chest spasm in panic as I realize something.  
The connection between me and my soulmate isn't open.  
I shouldn't be able to see Lance right now without the connection, but I do.  
Lance is really here and there are only a few feet and a door between us.  
I look up again and sure enough, Lance is grinning at some customers while writing down their order.  
He is really here.  
I snatch my hand back as if the handle burned me and hesitate for a moment before racing down the sidewalk, skipping the bus entirely to get as far away from that diner as possible.  
Because soulmates are stupid. 


	2. Chapter 2: (Reluctant) Acceptance

I stare, horrified at my reflection in my bathroom mirror. Where is he? I shouldn't see myself, I should see him. Our connection is open, so why can't I see him?

I know I'm in denial. I know that when you experience the sense of your soulmate in reality and not through the connection it disappears permanently except for the emotions. But I was hoping it was my imagination fooling me.

I can still feel his comfort and concern trying to reach out to me, but I keep pushing it away.

How could he have been so close to me without either of us knowing? He has worked at that damn diner for almost two years as far as I know and the bus stop I have used for longer than that is on the same block.

How many times have we almost ran into each other?

The connection finally breaks - I had opened it accidentally because of the sheer, sudden panic when I ran away from the diner. I saw him in the reflection of a shop I ran past, physically taken aback by my panic and holding himself up on the counter. The image had washed way slowly even though our connection was still open, so I cursed and ran faster, keeping my head down until I made it to my apartment building despite the burn in my legs and my lungs.

Now, he's really gone, but still here. And I'm conflicted.

I could still feel his emotions but I can't see him anymore. It's killing me. I always wished I hadn't been paired with a soulmate but now that I can't even see him. . .

It felt so lonely.

I sigh, hunching over the sink. "What the hell is wrong with me?" I groan, rubbing the heels of my hands into my eyes. Without thinking, I grab my phone and call Pidge.

She picks up on the third ring. "Hey, Keysmith."

"Hey, Pig Den. You're losing your touch," I respond, laughing shakily when I hear her snort. "You busy?"

"Only studying for my midterm on computer sciences in astrophysics, but not much I suppose," she says sarcastically.

I roll my eyes, "Midterms aren't for another few weeks. Do you want to hang out when you're done? We could go play video games for free at Best Buy for a few hours."

She's silent for a moment. "You drive a hard bargain," she starts, "I'm studying with someone right now, but I'll meet you at Best Buy in an hour and a half."

"Cool, I'll see you then, Pigtails," I smirk.

"Enough with the 'pig' ones-" she shouts. I cut her off, hanging up the phone. I look back up in the mirror at my reflection. I look exhausted and sickly in the fluorescent lighting, but that's nothing new.

My stomach brings my attention to the fact I still haven't had lunch and it's nearly three in the afternoon now. I leave the bathroom and grab some leftover pizza from a week ago for lunch and decide to distract myself with schoolwork until I meet Pidge.

* * *

"I'm offended you started without me, Pudgey," I say, walking up to her.

Pidge doesn't look away from the sample game she's playing on some new console when she says, "Nice try, but you've used that one before, Kettle. Besides, you're the one who's late."

I grab a controller and join her game, "I lost track of time."

"So, why the spontaneous invite to hang out?" Pidge casually ignores my taunt even though I can tell she's worried.

"It's nothing. How was studying?" I ask to change the subject. Luckily, she gets the hint and reluctantly answers my question.

"It was pretty good, actually. You know how I usually get super frantic and stressed when studying? The guy I was with, Hunk, was really nice and laid-back and he made it pretty fun," she says before jumping up excitedly when she manages to kill the boss in the video game. "For once, I feel like I'm prepared for this exam."

"Even though you always end up nailing it regardless, nerd," I snort, bumping her with my hip. She scoffs and steps on my foot. "Hey, hey, do you really want to start wrestling in here? We'll be banned and this is the only place we can play video games," I remind her, wincing at the sharp pain in my toes. "Fine, but don't underestimate me. I'm a mighty ball of fury condensed into a tiny body," she glares, setting down the controller when the sample ends. I set mine down, too, as she asks, "Do you want to try that one?"

I look at the console where she's pointing but freeze when I see a tall, tan guy with short brown hair facing away right beside it. "Uh," I start, panicking.

The whole point of leaving my house today was to distract myself from thinking of Lance. Now, he's here?

"Hey, are you alright?" Pidge asks, grabbing my elbow in an attempt to catch my attention. As she does, the guy turns around and I realize he looks nothing like Lance. He's hardly even as tall as him. "Do you know that guy or something?"

I exhale a sigh of relief and shake her off of me. "No, I thought I did for a second. Yeah, let's go play it."

Pidge follows me despite the unsure expression on her face. "Did that guy have something to do with your random call to hang out? Because you're acting really weird. You could've asked to hang out this morning on the way to class, but instead you call me hours later than that with a shaky voice and acting unusually happy. So either you were high on happy pills or something big happened and left you all shaken up," she says, stopping beside me at the new console but crossing her arms instead of picking up a controller.

"Pidge, really, I'm fine. It was nothing," I wave dismissively at her.

"So you weren't on some illegal drugs, I take it?" she concludes.

"What?" I ask incredulously.

"Well, Einstein, if you were high - which isn't something you would do - it most certainly wouldn't be in the early afternoon on a Thursday. Plus, you're too broke to buy drugs and I would kill you if I found out. So even though you're acting weird as fuck right now, I'm betting something happened and it was big enough to leave you shaken for hours.

"Now, are you going to tell me what the hell happened or should I just stop wasting my time and leave?" she demands.

I look away, furrowing my eyebrows. After a moment of contemplation, I cross my arms and mumble, "Okay, I'll tell you. But it's private, so I'd prefer to do it alone."

"Let's go, then," Pidge nods, unwrapping her puffy coat from around her waist and putting it back on. After a moment of staring at her incredulously, I follow her suit and zip my leather jacket back up over my hoodie. "Matt is working at his new job all night so we can go back to my place. He just went shopping, too, so we can find something for dinner there."

With that, we walk in silence the whole way to her apartment while I frantically find a way to explain everything to her.

She tries to lead me to her apartment building where I've been dozens of times only two blocks away but my long anxious strides carry me ahead of her. I open the door for her to the building and she hurries in ahead of me to the elevator.

We finally arrive to her apartment she shares with her brother which is much nicer than mine. We strip off our layers and she moves into the kitchen to scavenge for food. "I'll let you talk while I cook. No interruptions, I promise," she says, plucking a box of macaroni and cheese from a cupboard.

"Okay," I sigh. "But keep in mind the only person who knows about this is Shiro," I say before taking a seat on the island counter behind her. My first sentence causes her to visibly tense, but she keeps her promise of not interrupting. "I have a soulmate. We connected years ago and. . . Well, you know how I feel about soulmates. I get annoyed that I don't have a say in something involving my life, and this is pretty big. I'm able to see him through reflections when our connection is open and, based off what I've seen when our connection is open, his sense to me is taste. He's how I learned how to read lips and I constantly catch him gushing about having a soulmate to others when our connection is open.

"It makes me feel so guilty. He deserves someone who is just as enthusiastic about soulmates. Besides, he's way too good-looking for me," I laugh weakly, looking down at my hands. "But Shiro always tells me I should feel lucky and that I'm ungrateful.

"Anyway, today I may have seen him in person," I wince. Pidge turns around quickly in shock as she strains the noodles in the sink but is still silent. "Yeah, and I panicked an ran away before he saw me. Because my panic was so strong, the connection opened except I couldn't see him anymore. So he was really there, but I ran like a complete idiot! And now I have no idea what to do."

Pidge hands me a bowl of macaroni and cheese and leads me into the dining room. "Is that all?"

I sit down and rest my now pounding head on the table. I think for a second before saying, "Yeah, I think so. Go ahead."

"You're a dumbass," Pidge states simply, sitting across from me, "but I understand." I don't reply. I just groan loudly with my forehead resting on the table. I hear her sigh, "Look, Keith, I completely understand that you hate the whole concept of something greater tampering with your life, okay? But what I'm seeing is you letting that hatred keep you from realizing there has to be a reason you were paired with him."

I lift my head up and stare at her. "What do you mean?"

She chews for a moment while thinking of what to say. Once she swallows, she asks, "Have you ever heard any stories of soulmates who didn't work out? Soulmates who broke up, divorced, or separated because they just didn't fit together?" I shake my head in the middle of chewing after thinking for a moment. "Exactly. Unless one or both of them dies, soulmates stay together. I can tell you're sick of Shiro telling you how you should feel lucky, but I'm not going to tell you that. What I am going to tell you is you're choosing to give up an amazing opportunity of guaranteed happiness just to be a rebellious little shit to the universe. So take that, think for a while on what you think the smartest thing for you to do is, and just do it already," she concludes, shrugging and taking another bite of her macaroni and cheese.  
I blink at her. "Damn, Pidge, who knew you could be so insightful," I muse. "Just think about your next steps, dumbass," she rolls her eyes. "Also, I'm offended you didn't trust me with this information before." I look at her apologetically but obey and take some time to think while I continue to eat.

I think about Lance, about how happy he might be if he met me as his soulmate, about us being together. I remember the times I've seen him cuddling with children I assumed to be relatives and even his roommate and how I would push away the yearn to be in their place. I remember the times I would be absolutely furious and the only thing that could help me calm back down was his comfort reaching out to me through our connection. He would be happy, right? Or would he hate me?  
"Do you think he would hate me for knowing who he is without taking action?" I ask.

Pidge rolls her eyes again, "We just went through this. Of course not, soulmates don't hate each other. Even if he was mad, you two will get through it in the end. Just don't be stupid." I gnaw on my lip, ready to voice more of my concerns, until she casually asks, "So what's the weirdest thing that has happened to you and your soulmate? I don't know anybody who has one."

I'm taken aback by her sudden question but feel my face heat up immediately when I know the exact answer to her question. "That's none of your business," I mumble, shoving more food in my mouth and hiding my face in the bowl.

Pidge sits up straighter, face bright, "Nuh-uh, this has to be good if it's making you blush. You have to tell me now. What happened?"

I hang my head back, groaning into my hands that are covering my face, "Pidge, don't make me say it. Please. Have mercy."

"Nope. This is your payment for my counseling and my mac, now spill," she grins evilly.

I peek at her between my fingers before reluctantly dropping my hands. Knowing Pidge, she won't let this escape her. "Fine. It was sophomore year of high school when we first connected. It was really weird at first, naturally. One of the first few times our connection opened, Lance was. . ." I trail off and clear my throat, looking away. "Let's just say he was doing something that is common for horny high school boys to do."

Pidge bursts out laughing, hanging onto her chair to hold herself up. I scowl, my face growing warmer. "And you saw him jerking off?" she howls, "Oh my god! This is the funniest thing ever!"

"Yeah, yeah, laugh all you want, Satan, " I glare, flicking a cheesy noodle in her direction.

Eventually, her laughter dies down and she wipes her teary eyes. "Oh, man, that is freaking hilarious," she giggles. "So do you guys just have a silent pact now or something that you aren't allowed to do that anymore?"

"I fucking wish," I mutter.

"Wait, does he-" Pidge starts.

"Okay, I was done with this conversation five minutes ago," I interrupt, standing up. I walk away to put my empty bowl in the sink, hearing her laughter resuming behind me. "I need to head out now if I'm going to catch the bus," I say, checking the time on my phone, "I'll see you later, yeah?"

I turn to see her grinning ear-to-ear from laughing. "Sure. By the way, the guy I was studying with earlier, Hunk, invited me to a party tomorrow night with his friends. We should go."

"Sounds good," I nod, putting my jacket, gloves, and shoes on while she drops her own bowl in the sink. "Text me the info for the time and place. Oh, and Pidge?" I catch her attention, opening the door to leave. "Thanks."

* * *

It takes me over half an hour to get back to my apartment. I'm freezing and exhausted, but instead of passing out in bed I force myself into a hot shower with loud music in the background to keep me awake.

After I shower, I put my boxers on and brush my teeth. Once I've made sure I don't have any work due tomorrow, I finally head into my room, plug my phone in, and climb in bed under my comforter more than ready to sleep. However, thoughts from today crash into me full force, keeping me from sleeping.

I used to hate having to see Lance everywhere. Now, it's lonely not being able to see him. I feel our connection open because of my solitude.

He can sense it right away. As I lay in bed, I feel his comfort wrapping around my chest from behind like arms holding me. I relax in his not-so physical embrace, thankful for his solace, until an idea pops into my head.

A slightly dirty one.

I blush, remembering my conversation with Pidge and roll onto my back, nervousness pulsing in my chest.

"Screw it," I whisper, sliding my shaking hand underneath my boxers. A blush rises to my cheeks as I feel my soulmate's sudden surprise hit me and I grin smugly. "How does it feel to be on the receiving end?" I ask my empty room quietly. I decide it's also somewhat payback for the times he has done this to me at the most inconvenient times.

His surprise quickly turns to panic and slight embarrassment. I smirk, imagining him hurrying to excuse himself from his friends to hide in his bedroom, undoubtedly feeling the same warmth I do below his waist.

However, I'm startled a moment later when the same warmth is being reciprocated.

"Oh my god," I whisper, freezing as my face burns when I realize he's mimicking me.

Needless to say, it took a while before I was able to get some sleep.

* * *

"Pidge, I swear to God, I regret telling you anything," I hiss, pulling her back.

"Come on, this was your idea! I'm just ensuring you don't go back on your word," she rolls her eyes, still pulling my arm towards the diner.

I scoff, "All I did was tell you where he worked!"

While looking for a place to eat lunch, I may have made the mistake of telling Pidge that Lance works at this diner. Then, of course, she put together a plan for us to eat here so I could meet him, hence my ignored begs for us to leave.

"Yeah, but you thought it was a good idea to come eat here!" she points out, finally turning to face me.

"Initially!" I cross my arms, "Please don't make me do this."

Despite my desperate pleas, she puts her hands on her hips sternly until I reluctantly lead her inside.

"Welcome to the Lion's Den Diner, how may I help you?" a girl - who oddly has a British accent - asks as soon as we walk in. I nervously stare at the floor, trying to control my emotions so I don't accidentally open the connection with Lance in case he is here.

"A table for two, please," Pidge asks politely.

"Right this way," the worker instructs, leading us to a nearby table. Pidge and I sit across from each other as she informs us our waiter will help us soon.

Once she leaves, I risk looking up at Pidge to see smug smirk on her face. "So, what are you going to get?" she asks.

I glare at her briefly before practically burying my face in the menu. "I hate you," I grumble.

"Love you, too," she grins, looking at her own menu.

I take a deep breath and try to calm myself. I mean, what are the odds he's even working right now? They're slim, but not as much as the odds of him being our waiter, right? He probably isn't even here today, a lot of college students take Fridays off work. Maybe he left town for Thanksgiving break-

My thoughts are cut off by a voice saying, "Hello, I'll be your waiter today. The name's Lance. Can I get you two something to drink?"

And then, I'm coughing because I choked on my own spit.


	3. Chapter 3: Accidents Happen

As I choke rather unflatteringly on my spit, Pidge nervously say, "Hi, uh, I guess I'll order while he. . ." I look up at her to see her wince. "Yeah, anyway, I'll have. . ."

I frantically compose myself and pick up my menu with shaking hands. "And for you?" he asks.

I finally look up at him. "Uh, just a mint tea for me," I answer.

He smiles as he writes it down on his notepad, one hip jutted out to the side with the apron draped lazily over it. I lick my lips, trying my hardest to tame my emotions to not accidentally open our connection right beside each other. "Alright! I'll get these back out to you as soon as possible," he grins at each of us then sends me a wink that could bring world peace - I had to mentally convince myself it was even real.

I blush and nod, watching as he walks away. I find myself thankful his apron doesn't cover his backside.

"Wow, could you at least try to be less obvious? I can smell your arousal from here," Pidge grimaces.

I glare at her, "Hey, you forced me into this. Don't forget that."

She flips through the menu, "Are you controlling your emotions enough?"

"Yeah, but it's difficult. Not sure we should stay for dessert."

"It looks like you already got yours as he walked away," Pidge snickers.

After kicking her shin from underneath the table, I turn my attention to the menu as well. Soon, Lance comes back with two mugs - one with my tea and another with Pidge's hot chocolate. "Here you go," he chirps. "Good choice on the mint tea - I love the taste. Could I get you two anything to eat?"

I blush, knowing the reason he likes the taste is because of me. It's my favorite beverage and there was a time where I drank it everyday. So I was right, that is his sense. . .

Pidge orders a plate of chocolate chip pancakes before Lance turns to me expectantly. "Could I just have a side of fries?" I mutter as we hand him our menus.

"Sure thing, hot stuff. Want me to upgrade that to an order of cheesy fries? I'll give you a discount," he offers, winking at me again as he writes on his notepad.

My face warms up and I look away. "Really? Yeah, thanks," I respond, smiling shyly at him.

When he leaves again, I prop my elbows up on the table with my panicked face between my cold hands. "Pidge," I whine quietly.

"I'm not sure if I should be cheering or vomiting," she deadpans. I groan and drop my head on the table. "Just watch your emotions. We don't want all hell to break loose in the middle of the diner now, do we?"

"No," I mutter, sitting back up. "But his flirting is making it hard. I've seen Lance flirt aimlessly countless times, but I never expected to be on the receiving end. It actually kind of sucks because to him I'm just another person, you know?"

Pidge groans, "Dear lord, dude, he just met you. It's not like you are just going to marry him on the spot."

I glare at her and we banter back and forth until Lance returns with our food. "Enjoy your food. Wave me over when you're ready for the check," he smiles, handing us our plates.

"Thanks," I force out, smiling up at him. He tilts his head slightly in surprise before composing himself, nodding, and retreating back to the counter.

We eat, talking in between bites of food either about Lance - whenever he isn't nearby - or about the party. According to Pidge, the party is at a more upscale apartment building basically on the opposite side of the convenience store where Shiro works from my apartment. She advises to arrive later when more people will be there and it will be less awkward.

Anything she said about Lance, however, I tried to ignore to keep myself from blushing too much. By the time we finished eating, her ankles were bruised from the amount of times I had to kick her for making suggestive looks anytime Lance passed our table,

Eventually, Pidge waves him back over for the check. He drops it off with his trademark smile before being whisked away to another table. I marvel at how fluid he moves for only a moment before tearing my eyes away to help Pidge with the check. In the end, Pidge and I leave the diner without speaking to Lance besides bidding him goodbye - to which he wished us a beautiful night.

It's bittersweet as I make my way to my apartment alone. At first, I mentally gush about the whole encounter: seeing him in person, speaking to him, and, hell, him even flirting with me. Then, I begin to worry about where I go from here.

My mind races, frantically trying to come up with ideas. I could become a regular customer there and feign innocence when he finds out we're soulmates. I could march in there and be straightforward with him. I could move away, change my name, and start a new life.

Annoyed with the thoughts plaguing my mind, I take my earbuds out of my pocket and listen to some music on the rest of the way to drown them out.

At times like this, I stand by my belief of soulmates being stupid. So, I try to take my mind off of the whole situation by looking forward to the party tonight and texting Shiro the invitation.

Maybe for just one night I can feel normal.

* * *

I yawn behind the thick, red scarf around my neck. I found it while getting ready for the party in a box of belongings I don't normally use, but I can already tell this winter is going to be worse than the last few so I decided to resurrect it.

I'm glad I did, too, because Shiro is late and I'm stuck waiting outside in the cold.

He was supposed to meet me almost twenty minutes ago to go to the party. Usually, Shiro and I just go to a bar or stay in at his place on a Friday night so when I told him about the party, he was excited.

That along with not sleeping much last night are leaving me cranky to say the least, even after the events from lunch.

"Keith," I hear from behind me. I turn to see Shiro jogging up to me. "Sorry about that. Since Kolivan is on vacation, I had to close up the store," he explains.

I roll my eyes and turn around, "Let's just go, I'm freezing my ass off and it's still a few blocks away."

I feel a little guilty that I still haven't caught Shiro up on everything that has been going on with Lance, but I'm not in the mood to talk about it - especially not with him. I'd rather not start an hour long scolding in the mood I'm in right now. Since lunch, my energy and mood have been tanking. At this point, I just want to get drunk.

Clearly, Lance feels the same way. Our connection opens as we walk and I feel a thick bubbling in my torso. He's already drunk and I can't help but smirk at that - the night has just begun.

Finally, we find ourselves entering Balmera Apartments and using the elevator to get to the sixth floor as Pidge's directions instructed us to do. I knock on the door and we start unzipping our jackets. The music from inside shakes the door and I wonder if they will get a noise complaint.

The door opens and a tall girl opens it. "Hi, welcome! I'm Shay," she grins, opening the door for us. We smile politely and enter. After she quickly shows us where to put our coats and shoes, she returns to the party.

We follow her a moment later into the living room which is connected to both a dining room and the kitchen, all filled by about two dozen people. Shiro heads straight away to the kitchen for a drink and I begin to follow.

Suddenly, Pidge is stumbling up to me, anxious about something. "Keith! You're here. I need to tell you something quickly-" she starts, looking around us nervously.

"You okay, Piddle?" I ask, furrowing my eyebrows.

"You won't be," she laughs weakly. Her voice drops as she adds, "He's here."

My face falls and, as if on cue, Lance comes stumbling in from the bathroom, looking exactly as drunk as he felt earlier when our connection was over. "Shit," I whisper, horrified.

I watch as he drapes a lazy arm over someone's shoulders - I recognize him to be Lance's roommate. "The guy he's with, that's Hunk. He's the guy I've been studying with but trust me, I had no idea he was friends with Lance," she confesses.

And now my head is spinning. I groan, running a hand down my face. "I need a goddamn drink," I mutter, heading to the kitchen after Shiro, carefully avoiding Lance who hasn't seemed to notice me from the dining room.

I grab a bottle of beer and lean against a wall along the edge of the living room beside the hallway, only sometimes looking up to observe everyone. Lance bounces from room to room, talking animatedly to anyone who will listen. Shiro converses with a girl I almost don't recognize as the one who seated Pidge and I at the diner earlier and a tall, lanky man who is older with bright orange hair and a matching, thick mustache. Pidge is playing with a group of people on the living room floor an obscene card game I recognize. She often motions for me to join the game but I decline each time. For quite a while, I only move from that spot to kitchen for a new bottle of beer.

As I drink the last of my third bottle, I hear Lance exclaim excitedly about the song change. "I love this song," he gushes, turning the stereo up even more.  
I choke on my drink when I see him dancing to the sensual yet upbeat song. He sways his hips back and forth so enticingly. I clear my throat and watch, feeling goosebumps rise up my back and down my arms.

My eyes zone in on his hips, entranced by the hypnotic movements. When my eyes finally make it back to his face, I'm startled to see he's staring right back at me with dark eyes that I'm positive reflect my own. I feel my cheeks grow warm as I notice he's slowly dancing towards me. After briefly surveying the room as I set the empty beer bottle down on a nearby table, I see nobody even realizes what is happening right now. Not even Shiro or Pidge. I press my back against the wall at the same pace Lance dances towards me.

"You were at the diner earlier," he breathes once there's only a foot of space separating us, his voice low and husky and so tantalizing.

I feel our connection beginning to open but I inwardly fight to keep it shut. "Yeah," is all I can pathetically make out.

"I don't know what it is about you, but I couldn't stop thinking of you all afternoon," he confesses, inching closer,

My heart beats dangerously fast in my chest. "Neither could I," I confess.

He leans over me, so close now that our shirts are grazing each other and his nose nuzzles into my cheekbone. "I want to kiss you but I have a soulmate," he whispers.

I feel heart clench in my chest at his blind loyalty towards me. My temptations wins me over when I blurt out, "How do you know I'm not your soulmate?"

Lance smirks, dropping his head to look me in the eyes. "I guess there's one way for me to find out," he responds. I lick my lips and for a split second neither of us do anything.

That is, until I find myself pushing him into the dark hallway beside us and up against the wall, out of sight from everyone else. I tilt my head up slightly and kiss him softly at first, forcing myself to take my time despite the desire rapidly building up in my chest.

Lance slides his hand from my jaw to the back of my head, kissing back immediately. Our connection finally snaps open, electrifying my entire body with excitement. Lance clearly feels it, too, because he takes control and pushes me into the wall behind me and picks up speed. I moan into his mouth, pulling his body closer to mine by his hips, digging my fingers into his skin.

"You are him, aren't you?" Lance slurs between kisses.

"Yes," I whisper huskily, looking at him nervously, but he goes back to kissing me.

I bite down softly on his bottom lip and nearly crumble in his arms at the sound he makes when I do. In response, he tugs on the hair behind my ear - an area that until now I hadn't realized was a sweet spot for me - which causes me to moan embarrassingly loud. Lance takes this opportunity with my lips parted to deepen our kiss, gliding his tongue against mine. I lick the roof of his mouth behind his teeth, causing him to shiver beneath my hands. I feel his fingers trail down my neck, chest, and stomach until I feel his cold touch against my stomach beneath my shirt.

At this point, my head is spinning, our connection is so intense I feel it throbbing in my veins, and Lance is pushing up my shirt. I remind myself there are dozens of people in the room right beside us and that we're both drunk and reluctantly shove his hands away.

"Lance," I try to say but it comes out as a moan, encouraging him as he moves to kiss my neck just below my jaw. "Lance," I say, clearer this time although still shaky. I push him away and his hazy eyes look at me, confused, as I continue, "We can't do this now. We're drunk, and. . ."

Lance pouts, reaching out for the bottom of my shirt again, "Do we have to?"

"I. . . I'm sorry," I shake my head, taking his hand off my shirt and holding it instead. "I don't want to mess this up." Lance's expression seems to sober up as he smiles at me.

But I could not have been more wrong as he passes out in my arms a second later.

"Really, Lance? You have to be fucking kidding me," I curse, laughing bitterly. Of course, my first kiss with my soulmate ends up with him passing out. I sigh, holding him up with my elbows hooked underneath his armpits. I try to shift him more comfortably so I can get him to the couch. Entering the living room, I'm surprised to see nobody too bothered by the fact I'm carrying around someone who's unconscious. I lay him down on the couch carefully - but not so gracefully - and run a hand down my face. I look to my right and see Pidge passed out, too, on the floor in a ball with a throw pillow tucked between her knees and her chest. Straight ahead of me, Shiro is still talking to the girl but now in the kitchen with her sitting on top of the counter and him standing in front of her.

Not wanting to interrupt Shiro, I shoot him a quick text to inform him I'm walking Pidge home before moving to wake her up. She finally wakes up after the sixth attempt and stands up groggily, agreeing to let me walk her home.

By the time we're in our coats and shoes and leaving the building, she has waken up a little more but is still being slow. Meanwhile, I'm still shaken up by what has happened in the past half hour. "Pidge, could you walk a little faster or do you want me to carry you? I'm freezing out here and I just want to go home," I speak up, quieting as I add the last part.

"Alright, alright, let me hitch a ride," she says, yawning.

"Just don't drool on me if you fall asleep," I grin half-heartedly, squatting slightly so she can jump on my back.

Thanks to the several drinks in my system, I nearly fall over at first but luckily regain my composure. "You good?" she asks from above my head.

I hook my elbows under her knees, thankful that Pidge's apartment isn't too far from here.. "Yeah, just a little more drunk than I thought."

"I mean with Lance."

Sighing, I continue the long walk and reply, "I don't know."

"Talk to me, Kellogg," she murmurs into my hair, resting her head on top of mine.

"Well, he was dancing. . . and I was staring. . . and then we were suddenly making out in the hallway," I wince as I tell her.

Pidge tenses, then sits up, "Wait, what?"

"I couldn't stop myself. He told me not to kiss him at first because he has a soulmate so I asked, 'What if I'm your soulmate?'. Then, he encouraged me to find out and so we just kissed! We were both hammered - why did I choose that as the time I come out to him as his soulmate?" I exclaim, regret pooling in my stomach as I fully recall the even out loud. "But then, he tried to pick things up. I told him we shouldn't while we were drunk and he literally passed out in my arms. God, what the hell, Pidge? What did I do? He's going to-"

"Don't even say he's going to hate you, we already went through this," Pidge scolds. "Yeah, what you did was incredibly stupid, but he's at fault, too, and at least you realize what you did was not the best thing in the world to do. All you can do for now is let this take its course, okay?"

"But, Pidge. . ."

"But nothing. If I were you, I'd contemplate what to say the next time you see him. And I know you tend to spiral in the midst of your emotions, so just focus on the good in all of this. I mean, you made out with your soulmate. That's amazing, " Pidge says, laughing at the end.

I laugh weakly, too. "Thanks, Porridge."

Her cheek rests against the top of my head again as she says, "And if you want, Hunk and I are having breakfast tomorrow at Olkari Cakes. After all, waffles are your hangover cure, are they not?"

"Your proposition is tempting. . ." I trail off, feigning contemplation. "Alright, I'll come."

"Awesome! It'll be at ten-ish. Maybe later if we're still asleep."

"Will, uh," I clear my throat, "Lance be there?"

"No. You should be safe for the next twelve hours," Pidge responds and I can practically hear her eyes rolling.

I walk the rest of the way to her building in silence. Along the way, I feel her tense every once in a while as if she's fading in and out of sleep. It wouldn't surprise me, though, with how quiet she is.

When I step inside her apartment building, the sting in my face from the cold turns into dull throbbing. In the elevator, Pidge stirs but only briefly. I knock on her apartment door softly, mentally hoping Matt is home so I don't have to wake Pidge up to unlock the door.

Thankfully, the door opens only a moment later. I put my finger to my lips and point at Pidge, a muted warning that she's asleep, and he nods in understanding.

"Thanks for bringing her back safely," Matt whispers, letting me inside..

I wave it off and find my way to her bedroom where I put her down on her bed.

Pidge wakes up slightly as she plops into her pile of pillows and blankets. "Eh? Matt?" she grumbles.

"No, it's me. See you tomorrow, gremlin," I whisper, flicking her forehead. She scrunches her nose at me with her eyes shut and buries her face in her pillow. I smirk and leave, only chatting with Matt briefly before seeing myself out.

Fortunately, because I'm drunk my thoughts don't bother me as much as they normally would for the rest of the night. However, when I am only a block away from my building, I feel the connection opening slowly.

I regret welcoming it with open arms because a moment later, I'm vomiting in a public trash can.

I curse, spitting the bile out of my mouth. Lance's strong nausea from his own vomiting opened our connection and it along with my own pushed me over the edge.

I impulsively look at a car window ahead of me, searching for Lance's image to make sure he's okay, but I frown when I remember I can't anymore. I suppose it's a good thing, though, because he can't taste the puke in my mouth either.

I close my eyes, reaching comfort out to him and he does the same. His, though, feels apologetic - I think he knows he made me throw up and feels guilty about it even though it would have happened sooner or later. I smile at his thoughtfulness as our connection ends.

I cough into the trash can, spit once more, then hurry into my apartment building. Before I go to pass out in bed, I make myself some mint tea for my stomach and to rid my mouth of the acidic taste. As I lay in bed sipping my tea in my coziest pajamas, I smile to myself in the dark at the memory of my moment with Lance. It leaves me so giddy that, once my tea is finished, I tug at the hair at the hair behind my ear just like Lance did to help myself fall asleep.


End file.
